>be me
>cashier at Walgreens
>shitty job but it pays the bills while I wait to go back to school in spring
>slow night, not many customers
>suddenly see the fattest of fat -blam!-s approaching register
>cart full of Mountain Dew and Hot Pockets
>has so much fat that he has to lean on the cart to assist him with walking
>so fat that he won't take anything out of the cart, makes me scan everything while it's still in the cart
>isthis-blam!-erious.jpg
>a guy walks in only wanting a 20oz Pepsi, has to wait behind Fatty McGee
>total comes to 78 dollars
>shoves sweaty $100 bill in my face like an asshole
>mark it to make sure it's legit, go to put it in the register
>"wait let me give you the (whatever) cents"
>starts searching in pockets for approximately a decade looking for change
>by this point there are four people waiting behind Fat-blam!- McFatterson
>all visibly upset that they have to wait for him
>I call for second cashier
>everyone immediately goes to his line to stope dealing with all the fat
>this guy is seriously now running out of breath searching for change
>starts wheezing
>finally makes the change so I can give him all bills back
>second cashier's line empties
>guy spends a couple minutes sorting hot pockets, wallet, fat
>"I can't wait to get home and go to bed, it's been a long day"
>making small talk I say, "Long day at work?"
>"oh no, I don't have a job, I borrowed that money from my mom"
>"So what do you do?"
>"I moderate the forums on bungie.net"
>mfw
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