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originally posted in:The New Dojo
2/14/2017 2:35:32 AM
1
[spoiler]mhmm[/spoiler]
Sure.
[b]he takes the Bible[/b]
Can you tell me where I am?
English
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"What the hell?" The black suit asked. "You're smart enough to find us...but you don't know words. Right." He turned to white suit. "What kind of shot are you pulling?" "What?! Why would I do anything?! Why would I quintuple the price?!" "No idea. But this one here is too much of a dumb ass to be serious. So...." black suit waved his fingers and his men took aim at the white tux man.
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[b]Tubbs looks at Deity then the truck[/b] [b]Tubbs 2 appears behind the truck, ready to strike(and he's of course hidden so nobody can see him)[/b]
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Suddenly everyone open fired upon eachother, and Tubbs was left in the crossfire. He saw Deity sprint towards the truck and take down the driver as he sprinted beside it
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[b]Tubbs 2 tackles the guy in the black tux and Tubbs just runs and jumps in the car with Deity[/b] GO! GO! GO!
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"OH FU[i]CK[/i] OKAY!" He said as he started the truck. It took off, but Tubbs saw in the side view mirror that the survivors had all gotten in cars and began to drive after them.
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You did get the right car right? Because now everyone is chasing us and I want to have to steal another car.
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"Well considering this is a delivery truck and I didn't see a golden calf on any of the other cars, this better be it! You need to check the back though to make sure it's there!"
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Ok. Work on outrunning those cars chasing us. [spoiler]is it a big semi truck with the giant container on the back or a normal truck where I just climb into the back seat[/spoiler]
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"YA I GOT IT! NOW GET YOUR ASS ON THR BACK OF THIS TRUCK!"
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[b]he opens the door and a portal right beside it, then another in the back of the truck[/b] [b]he jumps through the portals and then closes them[/b] Now let's find that calf... [b]he looks around[/b]
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It didn't take much effort, since Tubbs realized he was sitting on something as soon as he entered the back. It was covered with a sheet...
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Let's go baby! [b]he rips the sheet off[/b]
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Under the sheet is a large Golden Calf, the size of an actual cow. It lays down on its legs and has its head turned to the left. Suddenly gunfire fires through the truck and at Tubbs, as the cars fire on him.
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IT'S HERE!!! [b]Tubbs throws the tarp at the windshield of a car and takes cover behind the calf[/b]
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A small window sized panel opened up to the front of the truck and Deity yelled through. "I need supporting fire now Tubbs! Take me out!"
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What am I supposed to do? Your writer nerfed me! The f[i]u[/i]cking hayseed...
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"Can't you still pull guns out of your dick?! Use something!" [spoiler]You have the submachine gun crossbow thing [/spoiler]
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[spoiler]yeah but it can't take out cars[/spoiler] OH SHUTUP! I DON'T SEE YOU DOING ANYTHING! [b]he pulls the Yuk.87 out of his pants and then stands up[/b] [b]it's crossbow mode[/b] One shot... how many people are in one of those cars? Wait, let me restart that. One shot, x amount of kills. [b]he shoots a tire on one of the cars and gets back in cover[/b]
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The tire blew up, which suddenly caused the car to slide and drift into another. This caused the second car to slide as well and then suddenly flip. Shots were fired From the flipped car which shot into another car, killing its driver who stopped driving and the car behind that car hit the car in front of it. Suddenly each of the cars blew up and Michael bay appeared from under the curtain Tubbs threw to the side with a Budweiser in hand. "Now that's what I'm talking about!" He said as he took a long sip sponsored by Budweiser. More cars drove through the flames, but now there were only three left. Deity looked into the hatch behind him "How is it-HOLY SHIT WHAT DID YOU DO?!"
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[b]he looks at Diety[/b] Well I guess you could say they just got put in... [b]he puts on sunglasses[/b] CARdio arrest. [b]YEEEEEEEEEEAHH[/b] [b]-10 points for crappy pun that didn't make sense[/b]
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Micheal bay chokes on his drink and explodes. Where as deity takes his hands off the steering wheel to slow clap. "Wow. That was just...wow." More gunfire came from the cars and shot off the side view mirrors. "I'm blind here Tubbs! You gotta take those bastards out!"
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Alright! [b]he takes an arm from Michael Bay and throws it at another car's windshield[/b]
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The driver freaks the hell out and the arm apparently was set to explode, destroying the car. The other two began to go faster and faster until they were on both sides of the truck. Tubbs was sent to the floor because they began to bump and crash into the sides.
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[b]since he hit the floor and there was a hole in the back of the truck, he rolled out but grabbed onto the back last second, however he is being dragged along now[/b] DEITY! DEITY! MAKE A RIGHT! JUST TRUST ME! [spoiler]so he'll ram into the car on the right[/spoiler]
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"GOT IT!" He said as he rammed the right side of the vehicle into the car beside him. This caused the other car to drift out of control and spin out, and crash.
