September 15th, 2015 *A speaker stands at a podium in front of enormous crowd gathered outside the shelter* "And now, we have overcome one of the greatest challenges humanity has ever faced. The crisis is over, and we have become stronger as a community. "Thanks to the efforts of thousands of selfless volunteers, the salt has been cleansed from the face of the earth. The world is once again safe for human habitation; no longer will we struggle against the toxicity of the place we once called home. The world is ours once more. As we honor the heroic sacrifices of those who--" *Aide rushes out with an urgent message for the speaker* "Excuse us folks, this will be just a moment." *The speaker steps down and listens intently* "Mhmm... Yeah. Of course I know what day it is, why do you think I'm giving this speech?! Wait, there's something else?! Oh no.... Don't tell me... Weapons tuning? Nerfs? The Taken King?" *Runs back to podium and addresses crowd* "I'm sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, but it appears there is another possible emergency on our hands. We are taking all available precautions and there's no need to pan--" *Salt begins raining everywhere, screaming is heard, klaxons start wailing* "EVERYONE BACK INSIDE THE SHELTER NOW!!! PREPARE TO SEAL THE BLAST DOORS!!"