Aha! Here we are! *hands you a pair of pants. Kind of a jamble of things.* This will grant you what you seek! Nothing will crush you,Hurt your feelings and generally screw you over! But I would recommend using them only when you need to. They may make you seem like an emotionless robot! HA!

"Just like my mother!!!!" *Takes pants, throws them into a rift* "What? Did you expect me to change into them in front of you?" *Jumps into rift, rift closes*