*Note: sarcasm/satire filled* LOL @ Patch Notes... <shakes head> Dear Community, Our devs and head of fun department are such *redacted*, and we hear you!!! So, we slapped them and like a pinata - Treasure keys fell out-a-everywhere. We were thanking them, but they snuck in some other stuff while we were distracted and chasing the new shiny things around like the latest carrot - we got so confused... anyway, here's what made it into the latest update, hope you enjoy! Fixed the Skolas ship thing, you can actually get the cipher now, (maybe)... no word on the emblem and shader though... please try and let us know. Also, if you did it before, heh, GJ! We knew you would do it again anyway, and look - a key! Heh, Qodron, we nerfed the hell out of him (Deej couldn't kill it either). We're allowing you to get that ToO emblem now since you were previously denied the drop, but you gotta earn it again to secure it... it's not that hard, right? Just read some of those 'git gud' posts - quite helpful! We heard you loud and clear, best public content we've produced to date. You had FUN looting the Ether Chests. Folks were helping each other that were not even on fireteams. Folks were reviving each other. There were mini-races between zones, lots of laughing and even new friends being built in our public spaces... crazy kind of happy accident we made there... and it was kinda timely with that new Gunsmith mechanic we introduced as Guardians were just plowing through those weapon parts, we know, we know - you loved it (right?)!! You actually were getting the occasional weapon amongst all the junk, and then roll it into something decent... We did too! So many good times had in the last couple weeks on Venus and in Skywatch and Banshee-44 in the Tower has never seen so much business! Our social / vendor spaces were really working! Oh well, that sh!t is over! One loot per chest only now. Yeah... we cried a bit when they told us. Too much fun was being had. We want you in the game for long periods of time, but you can't be having *that* kind of fun... Dev's said you can have some Queens Wrath rep though if you keep it up, LOL (high five?) Yes, this does mean those weapon parts just got a bit harder to come by... BNG hug? Yay, more Judgement Tokens that NOBODY was using in the first place! They are shiny though, right? We like shiny things. We are sure you do too. Since you likely already have full ship, shader and emblems, you can break down the plethora of tokens you are sitting on for +10 judgement rep each now - which should help since it only takes 3,000 rep to make 1 level rank up. The only question is - what will you do with all that new rep? A mere 300 tokens will get you a level! How will you use it? Cash in more tokens for a new ship? (We're hoping you grind and found out!) We know you are hoping to get packages at rank 3+... who doesn't want something from Variks in a gift package??? We know non-elemental primaries for your hard work is exactly what you are looking for! Better yet, Shank burn rocket launchers for everyone!!!! Grrrrrr-baby, Grrr... Well, at least you could use them for weapon parts - the Gunsmith will be waiting! Chests can drop class marks instead of ammo synths - brilliant!! You needed more of those, right? Why you mad, we gave you more space? Hunters love new capes... Our bad, evidently the devs are 'fixing' the fusion guns again. We know, we know... you were having fun with the Vex in PvP. That's against Dev policy. 1.1.1 has been invoked. Suck it up buttercup. This is the day of the shotgun and handcannon. However, just in time - since you can't actually get ammo synths or farm anymore from Etheric Chests - Dev's thought it would be cute to finally, NOW, let you stack ammo cakes! Woot - three cheers for the Fun-department decision-makers here at BNG HQ! Better late than never, right? Seriously, our Dev's are the bestest!! Woot! Woot! Woot! + + + PS - We understand that checkpoints in PoE would be nice, we like you playing the game for very long times. You request has been denied. PSS - We know the Treasure Keys aren't really useful for much, as most of the Queen's weapons are less than desirable compared to other items in game, sure, the queen's sniper, shoty and rocket are handy, but the rest... meh... and once you have a full set of exotics and the good raid weapons... The only other reason you go to the chest is for Elder cypher bounty completion... but, until you get to that point, well, they are handy for the kinder-guardians (BTW - I hear the newbs love that nickname, it's so less condesending... i digress.) That said - the PvE *real* reward comes from killing the boss in the Skolas Arena. Vet's want the cypher & elemental primaries. The cypher can come from a 34 run. So Skolas is all about the elmental primary - and that's a boss kill - nothing a key helps with, by design. BNG Fun Dept understands that a better way would have been to give you incremental percentage chances at better drops for the more rounds you completed... incentivizing play, or a chance at a cypher or armor / weapon core / Etheric along the way per round as a bonus... and guaranteed elemental primary when you got to the treasure room - but, instead, we created an event where you just want to get to Skolas - or blow-chunks trying. That's really it (you can get all the other Lv 35 carrots elsewhere) yeah, we know... Our genius was making the best loot in HoW RNG! So you can replay! However, we see you crafty folks out there... you kill him, you wipe on mines, and change toons to try him again with the next set of toons just to save time - oh you guardians are slick - and we're watchin'... please don't do that! (It takes the fun department longer to implement a stop to that kind of thinking. You remember baby-bumpers, right?!) You are violating the Dev fun and game-time policy! We like it when you play our game for REALLY long times and don't get rewarded, or only when we are ready to reward you... You can get treasure keys from the small chests now... didn't you see, the treasure room is your friend! Please go visit it after killing Skolas each time... Not-so-subliminal-message: "Farming Skolas is bad." (Fun Dept told us)... BNG Dev hug? :) See you in a week little light... need a key?