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Edited by PureBeast72:
9/14/2017 10:39:17 AM
840
Chuck Norris Jokes - Destiny 2 Version
I'll start, and you tell me your Chuck Norris jokes
Chuck Norris bought Thorn from the Gunsmith
Chuck Norris gave Gjallarhorn to Xûr
Chuck Norris found the 10th VoG chest on the release date
Chuck Norris didn't jump out of the bubble in time, Time's Vengeance was extended
Your turn
How about this one?
[spoiler]Why don't people mention Bruce Lee like they mention Chuck Norris?[/spoiler]
[spoiler]Because Bruce Lee ain't a f*cking joke![/spoiler]
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1 ReplyChuck Norris is incapable of completing the post mortem bounty.
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Edited by KDP Elite: 3/30/2015 5:24:57 PMChuck pulled Phobos closer to Mars while on vacation to get a better view during the Golden age and now everyone blames The Cabal. Oryx built shrines to pray to chuck for victory in conquest and has resulted in the hive taking thousands of worlds their crucible record is currently 1201-0. Servitors were originally a pristine white until Sepiks gave chuck a No land beyond as a reward... The Traveler main mission is to revive Chuck Norris. The Iron Lords want chuck Norris melee abilities nerfed or nothing. Chuck once launched his first super which left the basin we see today as Twilight Gap. Chuck once got into a fight with an Fallen Kell during the Golden age now all of The Fallen must drink their food through a straw what we see today as ether sups. Urzok the Hated is Chuck's Cousin. Fallen walkers get up and runaway in a comical fashion when Chuck joins public events.
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3 RepliesReplace chuck Norris with SmoggyPluto
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1 ReplyEdited by Dabsta: 3/30/2015 3:43:00 PMChuck Norris made an account. He named it Smoggypluto.
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Don't you mean SmoggyPluto?
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Kabr was not alone. he was with Chuck Norris.
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One time Chuck Norris's nightfall almost went to orbit
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Chuck Norris once passed a kidney stone. Now for some reason a bunch of wackos calling themselves "Guardians" worship the damn thing and call it something like the "Traveler" or some such.
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Chuck Norris sang and ir yut died
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8 RepliesThe Hive woke Chuck Norris. Thankfully, Chuck Norris was not the failsafe. Chuck Norris once won a staring contest with a Gorgon. When Chuck Norris sings, Oracles cease to exist. Before RNGesus can give any guardian a Gjallarhorn, he must first seek the approval of Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris wipes his ass with banners made of iron. Chuck Norris does not build super. Super builds Chuck. Chuck Norris regains health when shot by Red Death or Suros. If you look closely you'll notice that Gjallarhorn does not actually fire rockets. It fires Chuck Norris turds. [spoiler]I know, these are terrible.[/spoiler]
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Edited by The Clappin Captain: 3/30/2015 3:39:36 PM[quote]I'll start, and you tell me your Chuck Norris jokes Chuck Norris bought Thorn from the Gunsmith Chuck Norris gave Gjallarhorn to Xûr Chuck Norris found the 10th VoG chest on the release date Chuck Norris didn't jump out of the bubble in time, Time's Vengeance was extended Your turn How about this one? [spoiler]Why don't people mention Bruce Lee like they mention Chuck Norris?[/spoiler] [spoiler]Because Bruce Lee ain't a f*cking joke![/spoiler][/quote]Your bad at jokes. Someone had to say it.
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every time Chuck Norris starts a strike, he wins immediately because the enemy forfeits. Chuck Norris once bet the speaker he could win against anyone without using a gun, so he attached a plastic knife to a toy pulse rifle and invented the crucible after he massacred countless guardians, that gun is now on display in a museum know as the Red Death. lord Shaxx wears a fur scarf made out of Chuck Norris's pubes because they are bullet proof. Chuck Norris can pick up weapons from enemies hes killed. Chuck Norris got all current and future DLC as well as sequel titles for free.
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Chuck doesn't cheese Crota Crota Cheeses Chuck
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Chuck Norris once used a ward of dawn, but we called it The Traveler
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Chuck Norris was the Great war the speaker could of told you, but he was to scared.
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1 ReplyWhen chuck norris spawns on a planet the sky goes dark for the enemies and they see a 'public event incoming' notification. The best they ever achieve is one star for taking part.
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Chuck Norris once used invisibility to round-house kick someone. That is now the architects
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1 ReplyEdited by Fennimoe: 3/29/2015 3:27:13 PMBlade of Crota you say? You are actually wielding Chuck Norris on a stick.
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These are called smoggypluto jokes
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3 RepliesChuck Norris was once hit by a shoulder charge.. After a full day of agony the Titan finally died.
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Chuck Norris uses blink strike He blinks and it kills you
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I heard destiny's story joked that it would win in a fight vs chuck norris, thats why it hasnt been seen since the beta.
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Edited by IronWave: 4/15/2015 7:59:23 AMChuck Norris found and resurrected his own ghost......he called it the Traveller.
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The Cryptatch gave Chuck Norris shards from a legendary engram once... ONCE.
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Phogoth is one of Chuck Norris's sperm cells.
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Chuck Norris eats common items and sh**s out exotic shards.
