^^^ [i][u]PART 2 IS UP[/u][/i] ^^^ Okay, so I have a bit of an obsession with the Fallen Pike. Every day I would go to the moon and wait until the Dregs came along with their sexy Pikes. Then I'd kill them, mount their Pikes and I would be happy. I thought everything was good because I was special. I didn't see anyone else on a Pike. All that changed when I first played the Winter's Run strike. After defeating the hordes of enemies, it was my surprise to see four GLORIOUSLY GLORIOUS PIKES sitting there ready to be ridden like a Kardashian. However, the other two fireteam members mindlessly ran to the Pikes before me. My heart shattered as I saw them ride off. Those were MY Pikes. [i][u]The Fallen didn't mind if I took their Pikes.[/u][/i] I couldn't believe what was happening. Suddenly, this feeling came across me. I shrieked and yelled at my monitor. I spazzed out and threw the controller at my pet rhinoceros. He dropped dead instantly. The blood of the rhino was majestic but it was staining my spaghetti. Then I ran outside. I had been working on a replica of the Heavy Pike, the Holy Grail of vehicles. It wasn't done yet, but in my rage and fury I forgot that work still had to be done - it was dangerously unstable. I mounted the Heavy Pike and didn't wait for the garage door to open - I busted right through that bitch. My neighbors outside were terrified and they ran inside to digest their watermelon tacos in peace. The first thought I had was to head downtown. Pedestrians ran amok as I strafed left and right, releasing the deadly shock grenades. I pulled out my replica Shock Blade and shanked a small obese child. [i]Fatass Pike stealing douchebag[/i] I thought, even though he had nothing to do with the incident. A voice in my head told me I was going too far but I got on my imaginary Pike and ran that voice over. I didn't know someone had tipped off the cops. I was riding to the next city over. My rage was being released through the arc cannons on the Pike. Two unmarked police cruisers came out of nowhere to form a roadblock. I tried my best to swerve out of the way, but since the Pike was lacking proper strafe thrusters (I was using salty Desticle tears as a temporary replacement), the impact of the barricade hit me like a Skiff turret. It sent me ragdolling through the air. I broke almost every bone in my body. [spoiler]Even my penis. I had an erection because Pikes turn me on.[/spoiler] The last thing I remember was reaching to rub a pair of hard objects on my chest. It was dark after that. I'm sitting in the mental ward as I type this. Not sure how I got this phone to tell you my story. Hell, I'm not sure how I remember this whole incident. I'm not sure of anything anymore. The story made the news. A man gone crazy. A heartless murderer. None of it is true. I would do anything for the Pikes. Damnit, Fox News. However, I can tell you that the Pikes in the Winter's Run strike must be removed. For my sake. Do I regret what I've done? No. Will it happen again? Probably not. I plead of you, BUNGIE. Or you lose another obsessed player. I must go now. The nurses have sensed something is missing. But I can tell you that my love for Pikes will forever remain. Edit: I'm SO VERY glad you guys all like the story! the positive feedback makes me feel good like when I think about pikes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I was legit in the middle of Winter's Run when I wrote this lmao